I asked the other day group of acquitants what would they do if they had have a year to live as of now – Strangely non of them stated they would continue doing what they do now in their life, in other words being and feeling stuck, unhappy and earning money just to survive, to exist and continue to be unhappy. We know how easy is to get stuck in our mindset for whatever reasons might be. After all, how do You know you really don’t have a year or even less time to live? People believe they have years and years ahead , yet, one single day and you’ll be gone. That’s the fact of life and there is nothing we can do about it. What can we do while is not too late to build and to live life with meaning and passion – doing what we like and enjoy it wholeheartedly.
So, ask yourself honestly – am I doing really what I like in my life? Ask like you gonna die tomorrow. If your answer is NO, than my friends , this exercise is seriously for you. Please share it with your friends, notably young people who tend to be lost and disoriented whereby following dreams and expectations of their parents parents rather their own dreams.
The exercise is called ”value elicitation” and I have already written about it in my two posts https://bit.ly/2BCbR0J when brainstorming about the values and their importance in our lives and so called ”neurological levels” https://bit.ly/2SbLFzO
This now is just a summary for those lazy guys!
I have explained in my post that on the bottom of the pyramid https://bit.ly/2SbLFzO
is the environment, where we express our behaviour, and you certainly express it differently at home, at workplace, school, social gathering, etc…All these can control our behaviour that can turn into complacency. What I want to say is, if after some time of your ‘practicizing’ whether ”good” (positive or constructive) or ”bad” (negative, destructive or unproductive) behaviour, it will dear reader inevitably turn into a habit and your competency. Now, if competency is good (study to learn foreign language, or to become proficient in IT skills, or whatever, great! Congrats!).
However, if that whatever competency you produce unconsciously out of your behaviour is a ”bad” one (say, you suffer from procrastination, laziness)…guess what? Not sure it’s healthy and productive for your life in the longer run.
Above your skills and competencies in the pyramid are your values and beliefs – this is something so important that I can not underline enough, something that actually drives whole our life and consequently changes our physiological and psychical state in a heartbeat.
When I ask people ”What are your goals in life”. Believe me, that the most frequent answer I get is ”I just want to be happy and have lots of money”, or whatever it is. That’s OK, don’t get me wrong. Value money and financial abundance is OK too, why not. However, what you say might not be congruent in what you value. That’s the point and may be problematic. Why? Because if you want to be a millionaire but you don’t value money, but rather free time and other things, than it’s not gonna happen! You must be congruent in what you believe and value in life and hold it to be true. It’s so important to understand because when your environment, behaviour, beliefs and values are congruent, guess, what? You do not need to fake it and you can freely keep continue running your life according to your rules.
Try this exercise because it perfectly worked for me, as well as many people I know.
OK, let’s come back again to meaning of wording ”value”. Value is something that has meaning to you. Hence, for me personally one of the most important thing I value is an integrity. I simply like people with an integrity these days when we live in a virtual and fake reality. I appreciate and value very much honesty and trust as well.
Now it’s your term.
Make a list and hierarchy your values – start from ten, than brainstorm with yourself. You don’t need to accomplish this exercise today. You can come back tomorrow and re-visit it from time to time. Out of the first ten, reduce to seven, than, five,…till you come to the top three values that are really really important to you.